April 29th, 2003


No one is Looking.

My lunch today consisted of, among other things, tuna salad, applesauce, and yogurt, and I was dismayed to find that the cafeteria is 'out of spoons,' which is vaguely reminiscent of the time I went to get change for the register at my old job, and the bank across the street was 'out of dimes.'

So the yogurt and the applesauce, both of which were unnecessarily watery, slipped right through the fork I tried to use. I thought about drinking them, which is what I usually do, but that's not the way to make a good impression at a place that has just hired you-- you don't want someone walking in while you do shots of applesauce or grin like a five year-old in a Got Yogurt? commercial.

My fabulous idea, therefore, was to take the foil part that comes on top of the yogurt, and MAKE IT INTO A SPOON.
I cannot even begin to convey how pleased I was with myself for coming up with this. I was so excited; I started waiting for someone to drop by my cubicle and go, "What is...Is that a SPOON? Oh my GOD! You are so CREATIVE."

As I write this I have finished my yogurt, but have left the spoon near the opening of my cubicle, fervently hoping that someone will pass by and comment on it, offering, perhaps, to fund my continuing education at one of our country's prominent technical colleges.