The Ugly Volvo (theuglyvolvo) wrote,
The Ugly Volvo
theuglyvolvo

It's a nice day for a. White wedding.

So while cleaning the house this weekend, my parents came upon a box with some old wedding memorabilia: cake topper, invitations, directions, etc. And after having gone though the entire box, one of my favorite items was a list my father (forever the obsessive compulsive) made, detailing exactly what he and everyone else had to do at every moment during the ceremony and reception.
But my favorite, by far, was my mother's list of "things that went wrong at the wedding." This list was rather extensive.

1.) Ross reached for wrong hand

2.) Ross reached for wrong ring

3.) Lipstick on my teeth

4.) Frank's hair (Frank was the best man)

5.) Ross wearing one blue sock, one black sock

6.) Jo's dress wrong color

7.) Frank kissing Ross

8.) Missing soloist

9.) BOB's TIE

And my favorite, which was actually first on the list, and which neither my mother or my father ever mentioned before:

10.) Ross breaks into church with crowbar


They said something about it being winter and the doors were frozen shut and whatnot, but I'm not having any of their excuses.

A crowbar?

And we've got 90 zillion shots of the reception and not ONE of the door being opened. If I were a wedding photographer, I'd get my priorities straight.
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